Mad Man' Blog: Latest Entry

Shall we Stop Playing Patriot Games?

'Earlier this week David Cameron claimed it was the voters ‘Patriotic Duty’ to vote against Gordon Brown who was supposedly ‘destroying this country’ this obviously, implied that the voter should vote Tory. This comes from the party that has implied that Britain is ‘broken’ for the last four or five years. Not the most patriotic thing is it, talking down your nation in such a way? But I digress, I don’t want to start sounding like Ed Balls all of a sudden. Perish the thought. But it was interesting that Dave decided to use this emotionally charged and some what murky term, in the present climate..' (Click for More)

Breaking News: Haiti Earthquake, where was God? Oh, found him again..

'Did anyone see the TV show ‘Tsunami, Where was God?’ on channel four last month? It was awful. The worst of that channels pathetic attempts to infuse science/religion/philosophy with controversy. I am talking about this today, in part due to the Haitian earthquake of last week. I know, exploitative? Right? I hope not. Because after days of seeing this disaster unfold, I have a sick feeling in my stomach....'' (click here)

Cynicism and Democracy: Berlusconi’s Bloodied Face of the Future.

'Was Silvio punched? Or was his face battered by a stone miniature of Milan Cathedral? The big question. It is thought to be common knowledge, that Silvio Berlusconi, is a figure that you could not make him up. Yet look upon his stretched, bronzed, smirking face and see, quite possibly, the future of European democracy...' (click here)

BNP the Lberal's Favorite (white) Straw Man? Ah yes, the Liberals have been making hay while the sun shines, as it melts the ice caps and renders the Polar Bears overdressed. Then, they form that hay into their favourite straw men, those ‘Fascists’ the nasty old BNP. And I do not think they could have done a better job at showing the inherent imbecility of their own ideology, as well as its insipid danger. (click Here for more)

CGI Dreams Why am I approaching a subject such as CGI? Surely one of the other bozo’s on this site would be better doing that. It sounds beneath Mad Man. True, perhaps. But I just can not stay silent on this subject any more. I HATE CGI in films, these so called ‘special effects’ are anything but. What’s more, they betray a dominant metaphysics in our age, My old pal Marty Heidegger would be spinning in his Nazi grave. And that metaphysics is a bad metaphysics, and CGI is helping show us that. So the metaphysics of ‘presence’ What deuce is that? I think using Heidegger’s terminology is helpful. He says basically, that there are two ways of understanding Being, either in a detached intellectualized way, as a distinct, discrete object, with a fixed number of properties, and most importantly, as a fully present thing (temporally, spatially)  Click for More

Banker Bashing, Is it Deserved? Im not to sure about this. I think there are two issues that have been confounded here, firstly that, given that many banks are effectively nationalized, there is something indecent about bankers gaining undeserved bonuses paid for by tax payer money. I would agree that this seems wrong, in the immediate sense, but my problem here lies in the fact that this issue has become deeply entwined with the ‘blame the banker’ culture that has risen as a fake, and quite pathetic, critique of Late Capitalism'

There's no Time to Tolerate  'Is ultra Passivity dead in Britain today? It has defined our ideology for the last fifth teen years or so. Ultra passivity is broadly, not just the ideology of tolerance taken to the extreme. It is not a callow relativism, born out of weakness. It is rather born out of strength, of a strong and healthy system that is able to allow a number of differential elements (class race religion sexuality etc) to maintain them selves within the system as a whole......'

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 Latest entry: An Enquiry Concerning Chilcot Understanding Part III: Brown Bullies Chilcot?

Well, here is the last part of my trilogy about the Chilcot Inquiry! Let’s be fair, after Brown’s testimony, there’s nothing left of importance for said Inquiry, and after the election, it will be all but forgotten about. The media are still trying to squeeze as much as possible out of this total non-event, but with the flood of natural disasters, footballer’s wives’ tales, and the coming Armageddon/General Election (and relentless polls), Chilcot’s been pushed aside, until Brown’s Day of Reckoning. Now, the Judas who sold out Blair at the start of this Inquiry had to make a stand for himself and Tony Blair yesterday, as those thirty pieces of silver turned out to be fake. And the media...

 Apology Accepted, Commander McChrystal?

I rather exhausted myself after the Tony Blair two parter (which could be a trilogy after next Friday, if Brown doesn’t have to resign after ‘Bullygate’), so I’ll try a short and sweet one, as my wife often says. What’s tickled my prostate gland this week (and last week actually) is the Afghan War-winning Operation Moshtarak, civilian casualties, and the blatant reasons behind it. And no, I’m not talking about oil, money, or terminating the Taliban.

So ten days ago, as I was rubbing suntan lotion into the ageing skin of Mrs. Sucrose on the lovely beach of Pinamar....

An Enquiry Concerning Chilcot's Understanding Part 2-The Passion of Tony Blair

So the weekend is over, and John Terry is now the new Devil poisoning our youth with his immorality. I thought I’d leave Part 2 of my dissection of the Chilcot Inquiry until the Blair madness had subsided a little, or passed on to someone else. And sure enough, John Terry stepped up to the plate. Nice fellow, Mr. Terry, by the way. Met him at a charity ball I was having a couple of years ago. It was even myself who whispered in Cappello’s ear ‘I think he’d make a good captain.’ But obviously, I was wrong. How can a man engaged in extramarital affairs possibly be competent at football, let alone captain our national team? But that’s not what I came here to write about. What I came here to write about was The Passion of Tony Blair.

  An Enquiry Concerning Chilcot’s Understanding Part 1-Of the Chilcot Inquiry Before Blair

 Sorry I’ve been away chaps, just been doing a spot of helping in Haiti. Yes, other people who are rich and famous have merely sent in donations and carried on with receiving Golden Globes whilst asking for God’s help in Haiti. But Count Alain Sucrose never relies on God or charity (well, only for tax purposes). Yes, I got on my private jet and flew to Port-au-Prince But now I’m back, and just like all the news channels, I’m trying to forget about Haiti and focus on the Chilcot Inquiry. And why, I wonder, is that? Oh yes, the malign, evil, satanic Tony Blair is making his triumphant return to his homeland! The protestors are ready to do the only thing they do (protest), journalists are salivating over their notepads, the Tories and Liberal Democrats...

Churning up the Heat: Token Gestures and Climate Change Protesters-Welcome to Copenhagen, we’ve got fun and games...the police will bring you to your...cha na-na-na-na-na knees, knees, they wanna watch protestors bleed!

 Sorry about that, currently have every TV in the mansion (10 of them, all 52 inch HDTV ready), watching Sports Personality of the Year in opposition to The X Factor final. Hey, I know that it won’t make a difference to the ratings; it’s just a token gesture. My old lady was full of token gestures, like supporting England in the World Cup (she hated football!), supporting ‘Hamstrands’ when it was just an embryo (she was a vegetarian, although I remember her scoffing the remains of the turkey every Christmas), and giving to charities for the Third World (although she was a racist. It wasn’t her fault; it’s how they were back then!). You know a token gesture: an empty, meaningless gesture that adds nothing to anything and spoils everything ...

It Never Rains It Floods, For Gordon ''Hello to all you young people. Have been busy lately with filming series 7 of my reality/Bullying TV show ‘The Assistant’ You know the one, where I utter my famed catchphrase ‘You get the job’ or ‘You ain’t working for me’. A hit for sure, but hampered by recent events in Cumbria. We where filming a task where the contestants had to find stones and sell them to locals for a profit. Tim and Sanjita where arguing up Helvelyn about the value of a rock, when a torrent as high as the Empire State building washed them away. Luckily, they where picked up five minutes later down stream. I suspect their story was a false one, and they were actually up to no good. But the entire event had to be cancelled, due to a ‘one in a thousand year’ weather event. I watched the whole thing from my office in the Cucumber. On Sky News of course, where if to be believed, the entire Irish sea had been relocated into Cumbria.'

Obama-an Ig-NOBEL Choice for Peace Prize? Shiver my timbers, O’bandwagaon gets the Nobel Peace Prize!!! I’ve been absorbing this news since, well, I heard it on Sky News, and I believe it to be the biggest act of terrorism since 9/11. It’s a terrorism of the mind. I heard the news whilst in my cottage in Regina, Saskatchewan (in the middle of Canada for those of you not in the geographical know). So I asked my chauffeur to take me to the nearest coffee shop, where I could access wi-fi (an alien technology to the resident Inuits) and get this blog online. With my Mac Airbook in tow (Microsoft, in the next decade, will fall like the Lehman Brothers when Windows 7 causes every PC in the world to collapse, leading to the next Dark Age

 File Sharing Piracy? Shiver My Timbers! I don’t know how many of you are aware of this, but I have been a member of a rather secretive group of industrialists and entrepreneurs who meet ever 6 months on the top of Mount Fuji ,Japan, to discuss Hollyoaks plot developments and the future of the Global economy. The club is known as the ‘Big Catipalists’ Each of its members have a code name- Bill Gates is ‘chronic tiger’ Donald Trump the ‘lynx effect’ Bernie Madoff, ironically, ‘big cheetah’ And Branson, because of his high speed pretensions, is known as ‘Richard the Lion Dart’ (I suggest the Cheshire Cat, but this was promptly hissed at by my fellow Cats). I myself was known as Jaguar claw. I still believe that my name is the best. But its not about that anymore. You see I gave everything to that club, from my whiskers to my tail, it was I who I who edited our monthly newsletter that gave tips and investment advice on where and when to gamble in the markets: ‘Have a punt on Das Catipunt’. But we have fallen out big time over an issue concerning what to do about this bleeding internet business, all that stuff to do with illegal downloads.

BBC-U-L8r? Murdoch on the BBC-Profit Player or Freedom Fighter? Hello, it’s Sir Alain Sucrose again, here to give you an unbiased and accurate account of the world’s happenings. Well, I was about to, but my impartiality has been battered, like a lone person walking along the street at night, who gets blindsided by one of these modern youth mobs. And that’s why it’s taken me so long to write this blog. The anger inside me is almost unparalleled (I can only think that a comparable time was in 1986, when some pauper accused me of stealing the idea from Hamstrands from him. He was in prison for nearly two decades. I’m a near-billionaire. Take that al-Megrahi.) What riled me to this great extent (and chilled me to the bone) was Mr. Murdoch Jnr’s vicious assault on the BBC.